Five Key Steps to Take When Your Boss Harasses You

Here are a few steps that can help you handle it without feeling completely overwhelmed.

1. Start writing things down (seriously, do this right away)

It might feel a bit paranoid at first, but keeping track of what’s happening is one of the smartest things you can do. Jot down what was said or done, when it happened, where you were, and if anyone else was around. Save emails, texts, Slack messages – anything that shows what’s been going on.

You probably won’t remember every detail later – particularly if things keep happening. It’s tough to do this. Having it written down makes a huge difference if you ever need to explain your situation to someone else.

2. Take a look at your company’s rules

Digging through an employee handbook isn’t exactly fun. But it’s worth it here. Most workplaces have pretty clear policies about harassment and how to report it.

Knowing those steps ahead of time can make things feel a little less intimidating. It also helps you avoid going in blind if you decide to report what’s happening. Think of it as understanding the “rules of the game” before you make your next move.

3. Figure out if it crosses a legal line

Not every bad boss is breaking the law – but some absolutely are. If the behavior is tied to things like your gender, race, religion, disability, or age, that’s often considered illegal harassment.

This is where it can help to do a bit of research or even talk to someone who knows employment law. For examples, workers exercising rights in Montana (and in other places, too) may have specific protections depending on local laws. The most you understand what counts as illegal, the clearer your options become.

4. If you can, say something

This is one really depends on the situation. If it feels safe, sometimes just being direct can stop things early. You don’t have to make a big confrontation – something simple like, “Hey, I’m not comfortable with that,” or “Can we keep things professional?” can be enough.

But this isn’t a requirement. If your gut is telling you it’s not safe to speak up, listen to that. Protecting yourself matters more than being polite.

5. Don’t keep it to yourself – report it

If things keep happening, or if they’re serious from the start, it’s time to loop someone else in. Usually that means HR, or possibly someone higher up.

This part can feel intimidating – no question about it. A lot of people worry about being labeled “difficult.” Some might even fear facing backlash. But you deserve to work in an environment where you’re treated with respect, without harassment. That’s the bare minimum.

So, do what needs to be done. Bring your notes. Stick to the facts. Let the process play out.

And if your company doesn’t handle it well? That’s not the end of the road. There are outside options – legal advice, formal complaints, and other ways to protect yourself.

To conclude, if something feels off, it probably is. You don’t need to minimize it or explain it away. Dealing with a boss like this is tough, but taking small, steady steps can help you get back some control. You’re allowed to expect basic respect at work – no exceptions.